I am so freaking annoyed right now that I just have to vent for a second. There’s this guy who’s always at the gym every single time I’m able to drag my ass there for a 5 a.m. workout. I would admire his dedication and maybe give him some points for at least being cute if it weren’t for the fact that he totally disregards the “no cell phone” policy on top of being a disgusting “grunter.”
I want to scream, “Listen, asshole: anyone who’s here at the gym at 5 a.m. is here because we also have busy lives and important jobs and no other time to be here. But yet we can somehow survive without a phone for less than an hour — get over yourself.”
And beyond him using his phone, it’s what he’s talking about. It’s not like he’s an ER doctor on call and people’s lives are at stake if he doesn’t weigh in with critical advice or something. Instead, he’s pretty loudly discussing deal terms and company details that seem like they should be confidential. Does he think he’s impressing someone with that British accent? It’s not charming at 5 in the freaking morning. To make matters more interesting, I figured out which bank he’s with and which startup he’s repping for their Series A funding. If I were an evil person, I could retaliate when he brings them in for their pitch.
So I move to a totally separate floor from him and am doing free weights … and here he comes again. This time his phone is off, but this guy still can’t be quiet. Every single machine he uses or weight he lifts involves some sort of primal scream or gross-sounding grunt and I just cannot deal with it anymore. But dammit I really like this gym. And there is no other time for me to get here. I need to think of another strategy to avoid him, because I’m certainly not giving up my workouts because of this fool.
Full Ratchet 